Eternal Damnation | Windows Software Development |
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| Number TEN |
| It never ends. | You think you're almost done,
but you never really finish.
|
| Number NINE |
| You burn forever, but are not
consumed.
| Each update introduces new
and improved tortures, which
slowly consume you.
|
| Number EIGHT |
| Your fate is in the hands of
Satan, Prince of Darkness.
| Your fate is in the hands of
Gates, Prince of Incompatibility.
|
| Number SEVEN |
| Satan gives you something you
want in return for being damned.
| Gates makes you buy Windows 95.
|
| Number SIX |
| It is avoidable; an attractive,
widely-marketed alternative is
available.
|
Resistance is futile. All the
alternatives are damned or
doomed.
|
| Number FIVE |
| It is free.
| You pay, and pay, and pay just
to stay in the game.
|
| Number FOUR |
| Satan was once an angel.
| Gates started by writing a BASIC interpreter.
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| Number THREE |
| Hell has no Windows.
| Microsoft does.
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| Number TWO |
|
You only pass the Gates of Hell
one time.
|
The Gates of Microsoft keeps
popping up everywhere you look.
|
| AND NUMBER ONE: |
| Satan sincerely believes in the
triumph of Evil.
| Gates just does it for the money.
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